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Presenting the World’s First Breast Implants for Turkeys

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Thanksgiving is enough of a hassle without worrying about whether your turkey’s breasts are perky enough. If you’re tired of flat-chested fowl, try new Turkey Tits — implants made of gravy that only need stuffing, sizzling and serving.

I wish this actually existed, because it sounds both practical and delicious.

SEE MORE:
‘It’s Thanksgiving’: Is It Worse Than Rebecca Black’s ‘Friday?’
• Time Turkeys: The Very Real Script of the Very Real 2014 Woody Harrelson Movie About Time-Traveling Turkeys

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