‘Do Gay People Exist?’ Is Key Question In Marriage Equality Debate

Let me start by stating this very clearly for the record: I’m not gay. I love women. Too much, probably. I actually have a tendency to put them on a pedestal, as the saying goes, probably as a result of being mostly raised by a single mother, which often gets in the way.

But that’s a story for a different day.

Despite being a straight man, I find myself taking great offense to the way gays are often still treated these day. Granted, hetero-homo relations are better than they’ve been in the past, and we’re headed in the right direction, but there’s clearly still a lot of animosity towards the LGBT community, particularly where The Marriage Thing is concerned. And now the Chick-Fil-A controversy has brought it to the forefront yet again (background here).

Does it really matter what the Bible actually says about marriage? It’s all completely ridiculous if you stop to read the passages, including men being forced to marry their brother’s wives if the brother dies and women being forced to prove their virginity before getting married, which we all know don’t happen no mo’ (I was raised Jewish but believe me I’ve dated Christians and they wouldn’t be able to prove it either).

Let’s put aside all the Bible talk for a moment, and let’s instead think for a quick second about the argument gay marriage opponents are making.

What they’re saying boils down to this: “Gays shouldn’t be able to get married because it harms the sanctity of the institution of marriage.”

From some people’s points of view — the Palins and Santorums of the world included — this argument may actually makes little sense, for one reason: THEY BELIEVE GAYS DON’T ACTUALLY EXIST.

Sarah Palin and Rick Santorum believe — or SAY they believe — that gays are actually straight people who have simply gone astray for whatever reason, and so they prefer to take the position that gays are not in need of rights, but in need of a ‘cure.

The bottom line for people of this mind is: GAYS DON’T EXIST.

I happen to believe gays do exist. In fact, I’ve met quite a few gay people in my life. Some gays are more ‘gay-seeming’ than others, but never have I ever met a gay guy and thought: “Give that guy some time, show him the light, and he’ll like vagina soon enough.”

They won’t. They like dudes.

I can’t relate, but I can say I feel pretty confident that pretty much every gay guy I’ve ever met is as gay as I am straight, if not more so. In fact, usually more so.

Now here’s an actual fact: GAYS DO EXIST.

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Now let’s get to the logic part. Most people, gay marriage opponents and Christians included, would agree that if someone exists, that means God, or whatever you believe in, created them. Therefore, that person deserves to be as happy and enjoy the same rights as the next.

Sometimes the questions we ask are as important as the answers. So instead of asking “Do you support gay marriage?,” we should be asking this question: “Does a person who EXISTS deserve to be happy?”

I believe the answer to that would poll at almost 100% “Yes.”

Then let’s ask: “Do people get married to be happy?”

• SEE ALSO: Why Marriage Equality Is Passing

My parents are divorced — very divorced — but even they once upon a time must have thought marriage would bring them happiness. I’m guessing the answer to that question, though, would be 100% “Yes,” not discounting for bad jokes.

The follow-up question I propose we ask: “DO YOU BELIEVE GAYS EXIST?”

I’m not sure how support for that would poll, but I’m guessing far higher than the support for marriage equality. I know some people who say they’re against gay marriage, but they know very well that gay people actually exist.

Then the final question: SO IF SOMEONE WHO EXISTS DESERVES TO BE HAPPY, AND MARRIAGE MAKES PEOPLE HAPPY, AND GAYS EXIST … DO YOU SUPPORT GAY PEOPLE’S RIGHT TO MARRY?

THEN come back to me and tell me what those polls say. Because even though the current polls say half the country doesn’t believe in gay marriage, I’d be willing to bet a far lower percentage takes it to a Palin-Santorum level and believes gays don’t actually EXIST.

Do you?

Justin Kanew is a two-time “Amazing Race” not-winner and film producer in Los Angeles. He produced Jean Claude Van Damme’s first comedy “Welcome to the Jungle,” coming in 2013. Tweet him @Justin_Kanew.