Dwight Schrute: It is my greatest dream come true. Welcome to the Hotel Hell. Check-in time is now, check-out time is never.
Jim Halpert: Does my room have cable?
Dwight Schrute: No. And the sheets are made of fire.
Jim Halpert: Can I change rooms?
Dwight Schrute: Sorry, we’re all booked up. Hell convention in town.
Jim Halpert: Can I have a late checkout?
Dwight Schrute: I’ll have to talk to the manager.
Jim Halpert: You’re not the manager? Even in your own fantasy?
Dwight Schrute: I’m the owner. The co-owner. With Satan!
Jim Halpert: Okay. Just so I understand it: in your wildest fantasy, you are in Hell, and you are co-running a bed-and-breakfast with the Devil.
Dwight Schrute: Yeah, but I haven’t told you my salary yet.
Jim Halpert: Go.
Dwight Schrute: Eighty *thousand* dollars a year.
We thank our friends over at The Office Community Players for that scene from a 2007 episode, which so effortlessly and delightfully summarizes what’s going on at the top of GOP.com right now.
Even in the Republican Party’s wildest fantasies, on a page in which they can play out the past, present and future in any way they see fit, they believe that “Obama’s Last Day” will be January 20th, 2017.
It seems that’s not a Freudian typo, but rather an odd call for a change of direction.
But for now, just try to convince yourself that even the president’s worst enemies think their own slate of Republican challengers is weak sauce.