Kate Winslet got married last night. It’s her third marriage. The groom’s name is Ned Rocknroll. It was a secret ceremony. The newlyweds’ parents didn’t even know about it. The groom’s name is Ned Rocknroll. Leonardo DiCaprio knew about the wedding. He gave her away. Sir Richard Branson wasn’t there. His nephew is the groom. Whose name is Ned Rocknroll.
Here is a photo of Mr. and Mrs. Rocknroll. For the love of everything holy, please Kate Winslet, start going by Kate Rocknroll. Just do it.
Oh, and if you’re curious, Ned, changed his name from Abel Smith.