Hypervocal Menu
 

Blog

Rick Santorum Says He Contacted Google Over “Santorum” Search Problem

Share on FacebookTweet about this on Twitter

HVpolitics


By HVpolitics on September 20, 2011


Former Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum is consistently polling at about 2 percent nationally in his quest to win the Republican presidential nomination and preemptively ban man-on-dog sex.

Santorum’s biggest obstacle is that he’s just not a very sexy candidate, in political terms. He is a conservative’s conservative, fiscally and socially, but he has not done or said anything to take attention away from Mitt Romney, Rick Perry, or for that matter, Michele Bachmann.

Perhaps his second biggest obstacle is that every time someone says “Oh, I like what this Santorum guy is saying, maybe I should Google him,” they step into a world of graphic gay sex.

Go ahead, Google him.

The top link directs you to spreadingsantorum.com, which informs readers that “Santorum” is slang for the “frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex.” The third link is the Wikipedia page for this sexual neologism. In a world of Google bombing, Santorum’s own Wikipedia page comes below the X-rated hijinx.

Santorum’s troubles began eight years ago, when in his second term he made a stunning comparison of homosexuality to bestiality and pedophilia: “In every society, the definition of marriage has not ever to my knowledge included homosexuality,” Santorum began in a 2003 interview with the AP. “That’s not to pick on homosexuality. It’s not, you know, man on child, man on dog, or whatever the case may be.”

Syndicated sex columnist, podcaster, blogger and author Dan Savage, who later started the It Gets Better Project, didn’t particularly enjoy Santorum’s comments, so he held a contest for his readers to see who could come up with the best slang term for the senator’s last name. The winner, “by a wide margin,” that frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter. Savage added, “the runner-up, farting in the face of someone who’s rimming you, came in a distant second.”

Savage then launched spreadingsantorum.com, and sympathetic bloggers and prominent sites began linking to the site and passing it around. As a result of thousands of inbound links, it became a top Google search for “Santorum” fairly quickly. Savage, in a January 2004 column, said it was “wonderful” that his site “is now the first thing that comes up on Google after Sen. Santorum’s own websites.” Seven-plus years later, his site comes up before Santorum’s own websites; now, in fact, it comes up first. It’s perhaps the best Google bomb of all time, and it’s surely the best in the short political history of the web.

That prelude leads us to Tuesday, when POLITICO reported that Santorum for the first time admitted reaching out to Google to see if someone there can “remedy the issue.”

“I suspect if something was up there like that about Joe Biden, they’d get rid of it,” Santorum said. “If you’re a responsible business, you don’t let things like that happen in your business that have an impact on the country.”

He continued: “To have a business allow that type of filth to be purveyed through their website or through their system is something that they say they can’t handle but I suspect that’s not true.”

Google returned POLITICO’s call, saying they told the senator the same thing they tell everyone:

A Google spokesperson responded to Santorum by advising that users who want “content removed from the Internet should contact the webmaster of the page directly.”

“Google’s search results are a reflection of the content and information that is available on the web. Users who want content removed from the Internet should contact the webmaster of the page directly,” the spokesperson said. “Once the webmaster takes the page down from the web, it will be removed from Google’s search results through our usual crawling process.”

And so, frothy Santorum remains: Good luck “contacting the webmaster of the page directly.” Of course, there is another option: Savage has said in the past he will take it down if Santorum agrees to write a $5 million check to Freedom to Marry. Does the offer still stand? Is it worth it?

MORE FROTHINESS:

Rick “Santorum” Santorum: LGBT Community Waging Jihad Against Rick Santorum
Haiku-na Matata: A Treasury of Republican Presidential Haiku
Man Synonymous With Frothy Mixture of Lube & Fecal Matter Joins 2012 Race
Is He In Yet: Can Rick Santorum Overcome a Google Bomb in 2012?

Share on FacebookTweet about this on Twitter
TRENDING TODAY:


GET VOCAL - COMMENT

Check out HyperVocal's Polls on LockerDome on LockerDome