Ola Mae Robinson may look like your average, huggable grandma. But according to Pritchard, Ala. Police, she is an alleged crack-dealing offender. Multiple offender, actually.

After executing a search warrant on her home, police discovered quite a bit of crack cocaine and pills. Police arrested her this week and say she hasn’t learned much as she’s gotten older. Just this past June, she was picked up on possession and distribution charges.

“I don’t have time for no crack cocaine,” said Ola Mae when NBC15 showed up during the arrest. “Wish I was, cause then I’d have money.”

Police claim Robinson makes plenty of money selling drugs around her neighborhood.

It’s safe to say her legal defense is a strong one: “It wasn’t mine! Til they found me I was sitting up in my chair noddin!” That’s certainly more convincing than “If the glove don’t fit…”

Everyone knows if you’re sitting in your chair noddin’, you can’t possibly be selling or using drugs.

That’s the excuse most dudes use when they get caught cheating on their significant other. “Sorry, honey, despite walking in on me and another girl, I didn’t cheat on you because I was in my chair noddin’.”

Murder someone? Nope. You couldn’t have because you were in your chair noddin’. Here’s to hoping the noddin’ defense becomes a thing that law school students are forced to study.

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