Did you spend your childhood in Indiana dreaming of having a wedding like Diana and Charles’ nuptials? Did you host an early morning viewing party with tea and crumpets when William and Kate tied the knot? Were you in a state of glee the day Prince George was born? Are you a single adult female?
News flash: This is America, you’re the worst, and there’s a terrible new reality show coming that you should probably be on.
I Wanna Marry “Harry” is a new reality competition series now in production, according to Deadline.com, brought to you by evil elven mogul Ryan Seacrest and ZigZag productions. The premise: a bunch of ignorant American women are flown out to a “castle” in “England” where they “compete” for the affections of “Prince Harry.” Here’s the twist: It’s not actually Prince Harry.
In reality, the 12 women will be lusting after Matthew Hicks, a regular bloke living in a country where gingers are respected. He needs to act the part of the prince until the smartest of the dumbest bunch of girls in the world figure out the truth. What could possibly go wrong?
If you’re idiotic enough to believe that a Royal Brit would touch an American reality TV show with a 10-metre pole, then you deserve to be on this show. Anyone worth their weight in … pounds? quid? pence? … knows that Prince Harry is on the cusp of engagement to his longtime girlfriend, the Harry Potter character-sounding Cressida Bonas. And even if that relationship goes by the wayside, like poor, poor, orange-tinted Chelsy Davy, Queen Lizzy would never allow a grandson of hers to marry some American street trash. It’s bad enough that William wed a commoner.
Many of the details about this Fox vehicle are under wraps, but Deadline has learned that they’re shooting for a summer premiere.
God save the queen, but mostly god save America.Deadline]